When Life Hits Hard


It's been awhile since I last wrote this blog. Eighteen days ago to be exact. Though I committed to writing every Tuesday and Thursday, I have failed miserably. No excuses, however, I'm just getting back onto my feet after life hit me with a right cross in which both of my hands were down and my chin had no idea it was about to get walloped. As physically, mentally and emotionally tough I may think myself to be, this punch hit so hard I barely recall the moments before everything went completely dark and had no idea how I was going to get back up. Sometimes, it's hits like this that reveal to us far more than any of our erstwhile happy moments ever could. I now understand what my late, great mentor Van meant when he said, "I ain't never learned nuthin' in good times".


I'm not going to belabor you with what occurred, however, I'd like to share what I've learned from the experience that may be of value to you. When life hits hard and we're down for the count, if we're not dead, that means we're still alive. Recognizing this, we either let the punch hurt us so much we just give up OR we get back up and keep moving forward. If we understand life happens 'for' us, rather than 'to' us; our best options to not only survive but thrive, are to learn from the experience, get back up and keep moving forward with a renewed sense of understanding and wisdom. If we don't do this, we'll ignorantly walk right back into the fight, get sucker punched again and in sheer stupidity wonder how that happened. This is the truest definition of insanity, "continuing to think and do the same things but expecting a different result".


I don't have all the answers and don't pretend too. I do believe I'm smart enough to know I don't like getting hit that hard and the only way it won't happen again is to change the level of understanding that got me waylaid to begin with. As Einstein so eloquently stated, "we cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them". To do that, I've been reading, seeking counsel, guidance, coaching, and information from all sides of the equation. The good, the bad and the ugly. If you only look at one side, you'll be blind to another that could actually provide you the answers you're seeking. If you consider and compile information from as many sides as possible; you'll then be able to make an educated decision for yourself in which you can move forward with clarity, certainty and power. I've found it's not a matter of being 'right', it's a matter of being smarter than the problem by recognizing the problem usually begins and ends with us. Since a responsible person realizes the only thing they have control over is themselves, it's there that the changes must occur to produce a different result.


I'd love to be able to say I learned a hard lesson, all is well and life is now nothing but sunshine, rainbows and unicorns, however; that would be an absolute lie as I'm still learning, growing, and shaking the cobwebs out of my groggy noggin. Taking responsibility for my ignorance and actions, I've been deep in study and contemplation the past two and a half weeks thus my reluctance to write this blog as if I know something. Thankfully, along the way of my now 56 years and counting on earth, I've developed some incredible relationships with remarkable people that are my 'go to' when crisis shows up and I need to get another level of thinking. Eternal thanks go out to my rock of Gibraltar and wife Stephanie, my family and closest friends for your unyielding belief in and support of me. I wouldn't have a chance without you.


When life hits hard, remember that this too shall pass. No matter how hard it hits, if you ain't dead; get back up, learn from the whuppin' and come back stronger, smarter and better. I'm doing my best to honor these words and hope my pain may be your gain. With nothing but love and gratitude for it all.


Believe...